Sure, you can always watch warm, friendly Christmas movies that feature nice people doing nice things. We prefer, though, to celebrate the holidays a different way — with the weirdest movies we can find.
Fun Ways To Celebrate The Holidays
Wherein a kid gets left behind from a family vacation (twice, if you count Home Alone 2), and has to deal with burglars on his own. Not to mention eat whatever he wants, watch gangster movies, and rely on the “I’m just a little child” card whenever he gets caught. (Stupid premise — what mom wouldn’t quadruple-check after she left him once?) Home Alone became the highest-grossing comedy of all time, but without Daniel Stern and Joe Pesci, it wouldn’t be nearly as funny. (The hilarious “falling kids Christmas tree” in Home Alone 2: Lost In New York is worth that sequel alone.Yes, I know there are other Home Alone movies out there. Don’t bother.)
Did you ever wonder how Santa got his? (Elves, that is.) And what happens if a human gets accidentally mixed up in the lot? I like this one a lot better than Fred Claus — but either have that “I have no idea what’s going on, let’s boogie!” approach you want.
If you enjoy this “accidental relative” viewpoint, try The Santa Clause. The sequels have all the appeal of month-old pizza. Great posters, and lots of fun special effects, but the characters are just going through the motions. Don’t bother — unless you’ve got presents to wrap. Speaking of presents:
After fighting through the Black Friday crowd at Walmart, I related to Ah-nold’s frantic search for just the right toy; ‘otherwise, my kid’s not gonna love me.’ A lot of the movies seem to have this refrain echoing somewhere on the periphery. A little sad, if you think about it. (Do movie people really believe this is true?) Funny, unless you’re the one searching for Tickle Me Elmo, or the perfect sweater for your teenager.
And if you’re into classics, there’s always Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, one of the stupidest movies ever made.
But the best goofy holiday movie of all, the Grand Master of Holiday Weirdness, is:
Clark Griswold means sooo well, but everything he does messes up. (And the tree-hunting expedition was filmed in Colorado, not far from where we live.) It’s the mixture of whiny kids, strange relatives and childhood memories (not to mention Cousin Eddie’s white ‘bucks,’ leisure suit and funky camper parked in the driveway) that makes this exuberant look at Christmas so memorable.